Refrain from speaking
Push thoughts down in vain
Until they spiral out
In a cloud of vitriol and pain.
For none should have to hear
The voices in my head
And never more shall you
Worry of what’s inside instead.
I’ve tired of the fighting
Of looking for a friend
Of begging, pleading, wanting
I’d like a sure sweet end.
It’s torture inside my mind
And memory unfurls
Resentment, Pain, and absolution
cyclone round in angry whirls.
You call myself my friend
And yet you offer naught
I find myself reeling
Against the feelings that I fought.
No more talk of romance
No more dreams of future truths
I’ll just remain silent
And if you need further proof
I’ll hang my head and hide
Back away from any crowd
For fear of being obstinate
Abject terror at being loud.
I wear my emotions loosely
Balanced on my sleeve
I try not to let them show
But i’m too damn an easy read.
Back to books and poetry
Of Fiction great and small
For those character’s only hurt
while reading, that is all.
My blood still flows through my veins
My heart still pumps it though
And as I read of wondrous things
I too continue so.

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