It’s been awhile since last I posted. I apologize. After a family vacation to the mountains, and a subsequent tubing trip this weekend (that did not go well), I found myself back at work and hurried for my upcoming vacation. (I’m excited.) I have had no time to comment until now.
Now is the winter of our discontent. (no no no that’s wrong) Now is the time before the flight, the hours leading up to the two hour trip to the airport, and I’m already starting to feel a bit nervous. (cue anti-anxiety meds for a thousand, Alex).
I suppose I could continue on with FishBoy! But I just am not in the mood to rehash his tales, so this will likely be a shorter post than normal.
This post will be forever known as “Tinder Time”.
I did it. I downloaded Tinder. I don’t exactly know why. I’m not that interested in a hook up, and after reading many posts on here about the essential ‘date’ landed on Tinder, I should have known that all I’d hear from were wackjobs and lameos.
Case in Point.
#1. Hi, I don’t usually talk to women who are so much younger than me on here, but you are interested in a lot of the same things I am. I hope to hear back from you.
Ok so I checked out his profile. Not one pic that wasn’t a group or with another woman. But he seemed to be interested in Star Trek and Doctor Who so I wrote back.
Me: Hi how much older are you? Your profile states your 36. I’m 34. I see that you like Star Trek and Doctor Who. What is your favorite Trek? Who’s your doctor? What are you looking for on this site?
And then nothing… no more conversation. He poofed off the face of Tinder. Oh well More power to him.
#2. Hi! Sex?
Really. That’s what you choose to open with? I realize that Tinder makes it easy to send a blanket message to all the women in your area, but THAT can’t possibly work right? But as I was at work I figured I’d at least be polite.
Me: No sorry, I’m at work.
#2: When do you get off?
#2: Where do you work?
Me: about 2 hours from you.
#2: Well, if you want to hook up some other time my number is 999-999-9999
No, I did not save his number. No I have no intention of driving 2 hours for meaningless sex with a man I don’t know. Next.
#3: You r hawt. I wnt 2 mt u.
I didn’t feel the need to reply. He obviously didn’t have the ability to speak English, or type it..whatever.
Maybe it’s just me, but I actually miss corny pick-up lines. I miss “Well Fuck me if I am wrong, but isn’t your name Xena?” At least it took a bit of courage to ask, and what’s more it took brain functionality to come up with what to say. Now days Men can just type 3 letters and expect you to cum for them.
Perhaps Tinder is not the place for me. I’ll be deleting it at the earliest convenience. But we live, we learn, and we make better decisions the next time.